Now at the YOUNG (yes i’m young lol) age of 24 dating for me has become more serious.
Are we compatible? Where is this going? What are we? The level of chemistry you have with the person you’re currently dating or your spouse may be a little tricky to work out objectively, but certain facts can help answer all the questions rolling around in that brain of yours. So before all these questions become a little overwhelming, here are a few solid proof (well I think) ways to test your compatibility
Numbers never lie. It’s a fact. “2+2 is 4… -1 = 3 quick maths” sorry I had to. Back to being serious. Pay close attention to important frequencies while on your journey. For example, there are some good ones to keep note of : number of dates per week/month , number of times either party has cancelled, number of times they talk about their family or friends, number of times they mention that promotion at work that was well deserved by them.
You need to pay attention to both the high and low outliers. If he can name you all the great hip hop and rnb predecessors, then he must be really in to his music. If she’s asked 6 times in the last 1hour if her hair looks good, she may be a little pre-occupied with her appearance. And if he/she has only had one friend their entire youth, he/she isn’t really a social butterfly.
words, Words, WORDS!!. What words fly out of your mouth can say loads about your identity. Does he swear a lot? Do all of her sentences include a few words you obviously can’t spell. Its been proven by researchers that couples adapt in the beginning stages of dating to force compatibility. Conversation is key.
Words can also mirror the level, scope and focus of he/she intellectual pursuits. If he loves football, he will be constantly informing you on who’s been transferred. If she’s a bookworm, she’ll love to quote novels and a lot of imagery within her language.
I’m huge on reading, so bad grammar is one of the things that offend me in this world. So if your sentence makes no sense and you don’t try to rectify it. We’re over lol. Likewise, if our conversations don’t stimulate my mind, make me “hmmm” in wonder, then I’ll struggle to see this going any further.
As Drake says ” Sweat pants, hair tied. Chilling with no make-up on. That’s when you’re the prettiest. I hope that you don’t take it wrong” Stop lying. Because some males don’t like that. Girls don’t let Drake gass you lol. Okay back to being serious again…
Now, this may be one of the most important factors in the compatibility test. A spouse/potential partner SHOULD be there for you as much in the good times as in the bad times in our lives. One day, show up in your velour Adidas tracksuit, sliders, no eyebrows on. Complain about a dispute you had with a colleague at work. How your date/spouse reacts to your slight flaws will tell you a lot about them.
Ladies and gents. It may take a week, month, year but eventually the Ex-file might creep up. This couldn’t be more of a red flag. This has never happened to me personally, but it has to a friend. They were told by the person they were dating, that they reminded him of his ex.
This may be a clear indication that he/she probably didn’t get over their ex adequately or it didn’t end very well. So she’d be a repeat failed relationship maybe? Awkward turtle anyone lol. The past is not the most important thing but the level of attachment your date has to his or her past is.
In order to test this, you have to see where each party is vulnerable and powerful. He/she might drive the direction of the relationship while he/she takes hold of the speed. She might insist on always paying dutch (that’s me) while he initiates all the dates. When you’re really compatible, you’ll find roles that both parties are comfortable to slip in.
This is all the unnecessary information we don’t collate at the start of our dating journey. However, begins to be more apparent in its significance as time goes on. Religion, politics, money, and sex drive. Nationality, race, background, upbringing, and lifestyle. Education, the level of ambition, and age. Physical, social, and mental health. Personality and humour. Levels of affection, commitment, life experience, and long-term/short-term goals. Half of these can be accessed very quickly while the others may take years to gradually observe.
Okay, this is the point where you try and take the relationship to the next level. The physical, mental and social leap you take to test the progression of your relationship.
If you crave more affection, do something that may crank up the heat. But I mean don’t go wild lol in moderation!. If you’re beginning to wonder if your ‘bae’ can begin to integrate into parts of your daily life, invite them to a friend’s party, to a work event, ask them to join you on a outing. Sometimes spontaneity is the key to pushing your relationship to the next step.
I really hope this helps you! This topic has been on my heart for awhile and I thought ‘let’s just write a post’